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Friday, August 22, 2008

Why I'm A Racist

No, I'm not a member of The Nation of Islam or the Black Panther party. I don't belong to any ethnic groups, clubs or organizations.
I, like most people, am an "accidental racist".

I didn't plan on being racist. I even make an effort to learn how to avoid it. Most of the time, I don't even know that I'm doing something wrong.

For example;
We had a group of friends - three attractive Asian girls. We would often refer to them as 'The Joy Luck Club". We didn't know it was a racist title. We saw the movie, liked it, liked the women in the movie and liked this group of girls. I didn't consider their title racist until Mary Joy (one of the girls) told me that calling this group by that name was similar to calling my friends Turtle, Lydia and myself "The Good Times" gang because we were Black.

I also had a friend named Neil who I would call "YT" (or sometimes "White T' or "White E"). Yea..., I knew that that was a racist nick-name but we would always tease each other so it wasn't a big deal.

I have friends that I call:
"Black A** Rob"(Well... we is BLACK),
"Beautiful Tia Ray" (I could have used the English word "aunt" instead of the Spanish "tia". There was no need for me to use the Spanish just because she is Mexican.),
"Shaneka" (A white girl who had a very nice big butt. She would even answer to the name when she heard someone talking to someone actually named Shaneka.),
"Carmen" (A cute Mexican girl whose other nick-name was "Juicy"),
We would call Tiffani and Cheryl the "Booty Twins" and tell them that they had more a** than Black girls.
All of these statements would be considered "Racist" by today's P.C. police.

I'm sexist too.
One of the many names for one of my best friends is "BLT" [Big Left (Ta-tas)]. Her left breast was bigger than her right.
A girl named Faylene answered to "Goblets". (In reference to the size of her breasts resembling the largest glassware at the bar.)
Another girl named Shonna answered to "Bullets" (Her breasts were no bigger than ...)

Because I won't vote in favor of gay marriage, I'm a homo-phobe too. My friend ErickA related a civil union to a civil service at a court house so I couldn't protest along religious lines. Someone else pointed out the wording in the Loving v. case so that nullified my legal opposition.

When I worked at T.G.I.Friday's, I had a married customer who would always flirt. She would always show me her poorly done breast augmentation (they were kind of lumpy). This well tipping customer had become offended that I always had a group of gay guys at one corner of my bar. One day, she had finally had enough and she decided to complain to me. I handed her her cheque and asked her to leave. She couldn't understand how I could throw her out. I told her that I don't like discrimination in any form and that until she could follow those rules she was not to come back. A week later, she came back and apologized. The guys' sisters heard what happened (these girls were hot). I told them the story - only substituting "Lucky" (my bar-back) in place of myself. He became the hero of our gay crowd (and their hot sisters and friends). I don't like discrimination, I just want to make sure that GLBT groups won't end up suing churches. But still...I'm a "homo-phobe".

In a politically correct world, we are all some type of bigot or "ist" in some way. I'm just happy that my friends understand context and situation.
Like N.W.A. said; "F*** da' (P.C.) police.

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